How to Use a Fleshlight: Tips You Need to Know

Fleshlight is sex toy brand known for designing a game-changing male masturbator (although anyone with a penis can use it, you don’t have to identify as male).

Inside, you’ve got a soft sleeve made from SuperSkin material. Outside, a firm plastic case that looks vaguely torch-shaped. (Or flashlight-shaped, if you’re American. Hence the name). Thanks to this clever design, you can stash the toy in a bedside draw and no one will guess how it really lights you up.

SuperSkin is an incredibly soft and supple silicone-based material, which will caress your penis and balls just like a partner's skin might.

Inside the SuperSkin sleeve, you'll find a textured tunnel that'll hug your penis and stimulate all along the shaft and head. When lubed to perfection, Fleshlight toys can feel just like penetrative sex.

What types of Fleshlight are there?

From pocket pussy to realistic butts, there's all sorts to choose from. In the Fleshlight range alone, you've got:

• Fleshlight Girls: The opening to your toy is moulded to look just like the vulva of a famous porn star, like Stoya or Riley Reid. Inside, each toy has a unique texture, tailored to the star herself.
• Fleshjack Boys: Thrust into the backside of a gay porn star like Colby Keller. Shaped like a realistic anus with the same sensuous SuperSkin, each toy is filled delicious ridges and bumps.
• Non-realistic Fleshlights: If realism doesn't turn you on, that's OK too. Lovehoney and Fleshlight collaborated to design the compact and discreet Masterstroke. This masturbator still uses tantalisingly soft SuperSkin but has a more gender neutral appearance.

You can use your Fleshlight next time you're alone to enhance solo masturbation - or try it with a partner to bring a new dimension to foreplay. Before you begin, check out these tips for using your Fleshlight:

1. Warm it up

"The pre-heating was an essential part of the preparation," says Lovehoney customer Blake3393. "If was blindfolded and someone had used this one me, I'd have no idea it was a toy."

When the Fleshlight sleeve is close to body temperature, it’ll make your experience feel even more real. You can warm it up by removing the sleeve from the case and submerging it in warm water. But, if you want to get it properly dry before using it (which is when the real-feel SuperSkin really shines), it'll probably lose heat before you play.

So, the best way to warm your toy is by sliding it onto a Fleshlight warming rod, like this USB-powered one. It's so discreet, you could probably leave it on your desk and no one would clock it. Plus, it reaches 55°C in 10-15 minutes.

2. Lube it up

Lube makes all kind of penetrative sex better — including when you're using a stroker. You need lube for effortless, friction-free penetration. Plus, it'll make your toy feel enticingly wet, just like the real thing.

Pump a dollop of water-based lube onto your two fingers. Get excited as you coat the entrance of the sleeve and its internal canal with lube. Add a little more to your penis for extra slick fun.

Expert advice: When it comes to sex toys, your best best is water-based lube. It's compatible with virtually everything and won't degrade silicone toys over time (as silicone-based lube can).

3. Penetrate and thrust

Now you're both lubed up and raring to go, it's time to penetrate your Fleshlight. Push your penis gently into the opening and keep going until the full length is inside.

You can give yourself a second to enjoy the feeling of being deep inside the toy or start building the pace right away. The speed and rhythm is up to you, so freestyle in a way that feels good.

Next time you play, rather than going all the way in, you could start with just the tip. Tease the head of your penis around the entrance of the masturbator and thrust shallowly, raising your pulse and stimulating those nerve endings before you go deep.

4. Try vibrations

"I have a nice, small vibrator that I put in the other end," shares Lovehoney customer GoodSir. "It makes the orgasm strength out of this world."

Adding a bullet vibe will make you go weak at the knees. They're small enough to slip into the end of your Fleshlight and will add intense vibrations to your play.

Expert advice: Bullet vibes can be used by anyone to stimulate erogenous zones like the penis, balls, perineum, nipples... even the feet! Just remember, they're for external use only. You should never insert a bullet vibe into your bum — that's what prostate massagers are for.

5. Take it to the shower

Sometimes, you gotta be discreet. Masturbating in the shower is an oldie but goldie; no one can hear you (unless you're belting out Defying Gravity at the top of your lungs) and clean up is easy.

You can take your Fleshlight into the shower, just remember you'll still need lube to keep things slick and smooth.

If you like it hands-free look into getting yourself a shower mount. The suction cup base will adhere to the shower tiles, and the posable hinge means you can get your Fleshlight at exactly the right angle. Steamy.

6. Bring in a partner

Fleshlight toys are, hands-down, one of the best masturbation toys out there. But that doesn’t mean they’re only for playing solo.

You could use yours as a precursor to penetrative sex, or just enjoy it while masturbating together. Mutual masturbation can be a sexy, fun way to get off with your partner and learn how they like to be touched.

Plus, it's a godsend if your partner tends to get jaw ache while giving you a blow job! “My GF uses these on me in foreplay all the time to get me really hard,” says Drü, a Lovehoney customer.

If you like anal play, use a male masturbator while your partner focuses on rimming, fingering, or penetrating your anus with a sex toy or penis. In a heterosexual relationship? Your partner might enjoy pegging you while you masturbate with your Fleshlight.

Expert advice: Grab an open-ended Fleshlight like the QUICKSHOT Vantage and ask your partner to slide it up and down your shaft (with plenty of lube) while sucking the head of your penis. The dual-orifice design makes this toy the perfect companion to oral sex. Get more info on the QUICKSHOT below!

7. Try different positions

The first time you use a masturbator, you'll probably just lie on your back with your legs slightly apart. It's an easy, relaxing pose and a good place to start.

But, if you find the same masturbation techniques get dull over time, switching positions might help keep it interesting. For example, you could kneel with one hand against the wall for stability.

For a hands-free experience, wedge your Fleshlight between cushions on the sofa. Kneel in front of it and lower yourself down until you're able to slide yourself inside.

Try the doggy style sex position if you're experimenting with using a Fleshlight during anal sex with a partner. Kneel with your toy, holding yourself up by keeping one hand flat on the floor or bed. Or play solo by sticking a suction cup dildo to the wall (add plenty of anal lube) and backing up onto it while you masturbate with the Fleshlight.

To keep your Fleshlight smelling fresh and feeling amazing for a long time, you've got to take care of it. It's a little faffier than masturbating into a sock, sure, but it's so worth it. And it's easy.

Keep your Fleshlight clean

Remove the inner sleeve from the case and rinse everything thoroughly in warm water. You can use unscented soap or sex toy cleaner to scrub your Fleshlight inside and out. For more detailed info, check out our guide: How to Clean Your Fleshlight.

Dry your Fleshlight properly

If you don't let your Fleshlight air dry completely, you'll most likely end up with mould and bad odours. Yup, it can get pretty foul. After cleaning, shake off the excess water and pat your toy with a paper towel. Leave it in a ventilated area on a clean towel or drying rack for at least 24 hours.

Use renewer powder

Once the sleeve is completely dry, dust it with renewer powder. This will maintain the supple, real-feel SuperSkin and prevent your toy from feeling tacky or sticky to touch. Never use talcum powder as the oils can degrade SuperSkin over time.

If you're still wondering whether a Fleshlight is worth it, take it from the people who've tried one. We've examined hundreds of reviews and found out which male masturbator is best. Drum roll please...